A Bittersweet Existence » blessings

#PrayForKennadi by Casi

Dawana — Wed, 09 Jun 2010 17:21:14 +0000

Sick littles is anything but sugar coated. If one gets it, it’s a domino effect…so count on Lysol and Clorox wipes being your new best friends. Now if I went back to the first time one of my littles was sick— well lets just say — you would be reading for days. With my kids it all started young Zoe (7) began health issues at 8 weeks old. McKenzie (3) began health issues at 4 weeks old. Kennadi (2.5 months) was born a preemie at 5.6 oz and began health issues at 1 week. Yeah, so not everyone starts out as young as my girls did but no matter when it happens, it is never easy.

Kennadi Audrey Monroe was born 5 weeks early. She left the hospital weighing 4lbs 12oz but was a happy yet small little bundle of joy.

The first few weeks we didn’t have too much trouble – a little issue with weight gain but after finding out she had acid reflux – rice cereal was added to her diet and she quickly put on the weight.

It wasn’t until just a few weeks ago that was by far the hardest chapter in mommywood so far…………

At 11 weeks old she took her first trip to the ER with a fever of 102, non-stop cough, wheezing, struggling to breathe, and just plain miserable. After holding her down for a spinal tap, blood work, urinalysis, and chest xray we all were exhausted before we found out what was going on with her. The worst thing is watching a nurse struggling to put an IV line into your baby’s microscopic vein as they wail in pain just to follow with a tube down their nose, breathing treatments and everything else you can imagine.

Diagnosis: RSV and double infections.

Treatment: antibiotic and breathing treatments – something we are quite familiar with. We were discharged & thought we were in the clear and ready to get Kennadi well.

April 28th however was the worst day ever which was really still the 27th to us because we hadn’t slept at all. I have never seen a baby so sick and struggling for each breath. The whole way to the hospital she was choking, gasping for air and her breaths got further apart – almost as if she wasn’t breathing. She looked up at me with her big blue eyes like “Mom, help me.” It was at that moment I wanted to breakdown and cry but just reminded myself to breathe and stay strong but the pressure was seaping in almost more than I could handle. It was 3 a.m. so we headed to the Pediatric ER at the closest hospital where she would soon be admitted for RSV. For the next 48 hours (where I was awake for 44 of them) we watched her struggle, every moment – she was hardly eating so they put her on IV fluids and an antibitotic for the double ear infections. She was placed on oxygen and in a mist tent – at that point we couldn’t hold her. It was the hardest moment of my life. Watching this tiny little person fighting so hard, just storming through it and still showing a little smile. Seeing your little one sick is hard but not being able to pick her up and console her is even worse. We were told that we would be in the hospital at the minimum 3 days.

However, we got a surprise and on the second day the doctor came in and decided that Kennadi was over her peak period for RSV and could now go home. They took her off oxygen and within 15 minutes we were out the door. I couldn’t believe it. One minute we are going to be there for even longer and the next day they seemed to think she was okay to be home. At this point, I was exhausted, mentally and emotionally, so I packed our things and within 15 minutes we were out the door.

We got into the car and buckled her in and felt free – but something was holding me back, call it mother’s intuition if you will, but I was just nervous as we pulled out of the parking lot — I kept telling my husband, I don’t think she is ready to go home — she still looks like she is struggling. He said, lets just see how she does — maybe I was just worrying I told myself and just prayed the whole way home not realizing within a few hours we would only be back where we started.

We got home and within twenty minutes she started to retract again, struggling with each breath – her respiratory rate was 90 (in a newborn her age it should be around 30) — she was breathing way too hard and way too fast for her little body. We had to get back to the hospital and fast — she had taken a turn for the worst. We hadn’t even unpacked the car so we jumped back in and flew around the corner to a good friends house who is a Chief Deputy of our local police office. I told him we needed to get to the hospital and fast. With rush hour traffic we wouldn’t have been able to get there in time and we didn’t want to call 911 because our local hospital doesn’t have a good Pediatric center. With no hesitation he jumped in his undercover police car and said “come on” – I grabbed Kennadi and just prayed with each breath she took and tried not to notice the fact that I felt like I was on a high speed police chase, dodging cars and going through red lights… but that is besides the
point. WITHOUT HIM SHE PROBABLY WON’T HAVE MADE IT, HE WAS OUR TRUE ANGEL & HERO. WE ARE THANKFUL FOR HIM AND HIS FAMILY EVERYDAY. Kennadi kept looking up at me with her big blue eyes. With each breath she was getting more and more tuckered out — I could see it in her eyes, she just wanted to give up, and she did. For about 3 seconds (about an eternity for me) Kennadi stopped breathing. She looked up and closed her eyes and I just said please God don’t do this to us – I need her to stay strong. I have never been so terrified in my life.

Finally we arrived in the hospital and I flew in like a bat out of hell — the nurses were shocked but not so shocked to see us back. They were surprised we were even discharged — that was just great to hear (hint the sarcasm). Immediately, Kennadi was all plugged back up to oxygen, IV, breathing treatments, etc — all over again. I remember tweeting in desperation for prayers & supports as I thought I may have a nervous break down from stress and lack of sleep. A new doctor came in within minutes and knew everything that was going on – he said lets continue what we were doing and keep a close eye. I said NO and demanded to be transported to one of the nations top hospitals – Children’s Hospital in Washington, DC. They didn’t argue and suggested we should definitely go to extreme measures to get her the care she needs. Five hours later the NICU team from Children’s Hospital arrived — my poor little one was now being transported in a box.

When we arrived to Children’s it was a whirlwind – Kennadi was in complete distress and we had to explain everything to them — the same timeline I had been replaying in my head for days. Kennadi was placed on a Vaportherm and continued on her IV — but they added heart monitors and a pulse ox to the mix — she had a total of 5 wires hanging from her body that I constantly was getting tangled in. This was a nightmare I wasn’t sure would ever end. But luckily, there was light at the end of the tunnel.

To make a long story short (if that is even possible at this point) Kennadi was in amazing care in the NICU where I never left her side once except for four hours during the 7 day period and I had a friend come sit with her so I could make my first graders play (I had not seen them in 7 days) — minus the set back of picking up a contaminate bug from the previous hospital — her ear infection cleared up as well as her pneumonia. They slowly took her off oxygen and she was watched for a full 12 hours off oxygen before being discharged. But at least we left on no medication except the Prevacid for her acid reflux – - she seemed healthy and happy. Even though she was on contact isolation leaving the hospital — I didn’t care, I was now a complete germaphobe and wasn’t letting anyone near her. I was so relieved to be done with the oxygen, the wires, the blood test, steroids, antibiotics, germs — but most of all I was so blessed to have my Kennadi back.

After ten long days I realized many things sitting there with Kennadi — mostly by myself — that prayer is a powerful thing and that my social media network is the best support system a gal could ask for. Without the outpouring of tweets every single day – well, I honestly don’t know how well I would have pulled through. During the moments of pure madness and moments I just wanted to scream and cry — my twitter gals were there – supporting, praying, emailing, texting, bbm-ing and making #prayforkennadi a trending topic — I just want to take a moment to thank each and every one of you. Thank you for following me on this journey and thank you for being there every step of the way. You all have a very special place in my heart and I am sure once I share this story with Kennadi — she will a hold a very special place in her heart for all of you.

At the end of the day — it is all about faith. Kennadi was the only baby in the NICU unit this season that did not have to be incubated – out of the many babies admitted with RSV (and one who didn’t make it)
– the fact that we came out okay – well, that is just amazing. And when you are in a situation like this and you almost lose a child you just have to realize – God works miracles and I thank him everyday for mine.

Pray.Have faith. God works miracles.

About Casi:

Casi is editor of cupcakeMAG (www.cupcakemag.com) ringleader of her 3 girls, Zoe (7), McKenzie (3) and of course Kennadi (4 months) along with 4 rescue dogs and let’s not forget to mention her darling hubs.

When she isn’t writing and interviewing celebs you can catch her watching reality TV, reading the “weeklies”, wishing she had a nanny and chasing after her littles!

Check out the cupcakeMAG and Sprinkles blogs for everything from the latest lip gloss to exclusive celebrity interviews to product reviews + giveaways galore. From a fashionista to a mommaista where we feature chic things for your littles – we always have something for your fashion sweet spots.

You can also follow Casi on twitter (@cupcakeMAG)

About Tales From The Crib:

Thought up by Dawana, author of A Bittersweet Existence, as a way to share stories from a variety of Moms in one place regarding the trials and tribulations. A Stay-At-Home Mom herself who often thinks she is losing her mind, Dawana has found a great deal of comfort in the stories from other Moms and wanted to share them all in one place. If you’d like to submit a story, please feel free to email Dawana by clicking here.

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Sacrifices And Security

Dawana — Sun, 06 Jun 2010 03:49:49 +0000

What do you remember about your childhood?

I remember my first pair of Nikes.

I remember my first Guess outfit that I was able to buy for myself.

I remember my older brother making bottle rockets in Heineken bottles and me being terrified ’cause I thought glass would shatter everywhere.

I remember lots of parties and lots of loud music. I assume that this is the reason my hearing is not so great.

I remember a two-door Nissan Sentra, then a Nissan Pathfinder in 1991- the year my younger brother was born.

Oh and I remember the Pathfinder being crashed by you know who and you know how many times. (love you bro)

I remember rice & peas, oxtails, curry goat, stew chicken, escovitch. Nom, Nom, Nom- you have to appreciate Jamaican food.

What I don’t remember is never having anything to eat.

I don’t remember worrying about where I was going to live.

I don’t remember not having that joy of having family around.

I always had a place to lay my head. I always had friends growing up.

And I had because of my parents.

Sure, they fought and as far as I was concerned they hated each other.

As an adult, though, I am so glad that my father was in my life. It made a huge difference.

————–

My husband is watching this documentary on basketball and these kids are talking about moving 5, 6, 7 times. Not knowing if they would have something to eat. Wearing clothes down to the ground til they were worn. Not having a father, some no mother either and having to be raised by brothers or sisters.

————–

I had security.

Regardless of how my parents felt about each other they made a commitment to us, their children, to be around.

They took up side jobs- working as bouncers at night clubs ’til the wee hours in the morning or working at Macy’s as a part-time job in addition to a full time day job in Insurance.

They did what they needed to do so that we could have and not want for the necessary things in life.

When I look at my daughter, I want to give her everything she needs and the things that she wants, too. My parents taught me the golden rule of parenting (in my opinion). Which is that I need to do whatever is in my power to make sure that my kids never want for anything- even if that means making sacrifices… maybe sacrificing my dreams (temporarily) or parents who make sure their kids eat before they eat. Buying what your kids need instead of buying something that you want.

You know, our kids didn’t ask to be on this Earth. We brought them here.

I know that a lot of people out there have it hard. Watching things like this documentary and listening to these guys stories reminds me of what is important and just makes me grateful for how I was raised. It puts things in perspective.

I am just thankful to my parents for providing my siblings and I with that constant security. I’m thankful to my parents for the sacrifices that they made for us… and for any of the times they ever went without so that we could have.

It takes becoming a grown-up to really appreciate the little things. I am now learning, too, that even when you think they are not looking- they are. (They being our kids) And they are learning from us- our actions, our behavior- how we treat ourselves and others.

Now, my parents live on two separate ends of the East Coast- but I know that I always have a place to call home. I can just choose between Florida and New York.

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The Results

Dawana — Mon, 03 May 2010 22:48:47 +0000

I went in for the biopsy last week Tuesday and the nurse told me that I should have the results by Friday.

Friday came and I hadn’t heard back from my Doctor’s Office, so I gave them a call. The nurse assured me that she would put a note in my file and the doctor would be calling me before the end of the day to let me know.

Well the end of the day came and went. When Hubby came home he was beyond pissed at how unprofessional they were being and considered looking the Doctor up in the phone book to call her at home. To which I said “uhh no, we will call them on Monday.”

This morning I call and after being on hold for 13 minutes. I hang up, call back and wait some more. Hubby is in the other room talking on the phone to God knows who. It turns out, he’s on the phone with the administration of our little desert town’s medical facilities filing a complaint and finds out information from that person while I am still on hold listening to some guy tell me how “important my call is.”

Long story short? Don’t fuck with me or my Hubby will probably rip you a new asshole. He was telling them about all of the complaints that he was going to file because NO ONE should have to wait that long on results that could tell you whether you have something like cancer or not.

And. Finally. Thank You for all of your prayers and support. It is a cyst, it is benign. So every prayer put out there from you guys worked and I appreciate it.

Excuse me while I go find a new doctor. Since my Hubby took the time to rip them a new one, I am not going back there, they may try to kill me.

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Funny

Dawana — Fri, 16 Apr 2010 17:36:19 +0000

God is so funny.

If you know Him, then you know He is.

I called my friend Melissa this morning to ask her opinion on some photos that I took of a friend’s daughter. The conversation quickly went from my pictures, to photography in general, to cameras, to life, kids, and all of a sudden we are talking about God and His works in our lives and praying.

I thank God for Skype- it is a miraculous tool that allowed me to have that moment of fellowship and prayer with a friend all the way in Florida. But it also allowed me to open up with someone about something that I have been keeping to myself.

It is not something that I am willing to share just yet. But Melissa specifically told me to put it out there that I would love for my fellow Christians to lift me up in prayer. In due time I will reveal what is going on. So, if you believe in Him, I definitely ask that you keep both me and my family in your prayers. I would really appreciate it.

I’ll leave you with the verse Melissa shared with me:

2 Corinthians 1:3 says: “Praise be to the God and Father or our Lord Jesus Christ. God is the Father who is full of mercy and all comfort. He comforts us every time we have trouble, so when others have trouble, we can comfort them with the same comfort God gives us.”

Thanks, Melissa.

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For Layla

Dawana — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 19:36:35 +0000

Isaiah 49:14-16
But Zion said, “The LORD has forsaken me, the Lord has forgotten me.” “Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you! See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands; your walls are ever before me.”

The day that Cadence was born was the happiest day of my life. Almost everyday my husband and I wonder aloud why she is so “bad” and where she gets this behavior from. When my days with her get so overwhelming that I feel like I’ve reached my limit, my husband grabs my hand and reminds me of Layla Grace and what I’ve told him about her.

Then came the following Tweet from Layla’s family:

I cannot explain the pain that ripped through my body. I know that I don’t know this family, but it is hard as a mother not to feel their pain, to imagine what they are going through and to realize that this could be my child.

I find comfort knowing that Layla is no longer living in pain. It was tearing me apart watching her Mom and Dad tweet about her not eating, not pooping, not waking up and then last night they mentioned Layla’s feet were getting cold.

All we can do is continue to pray for their family, especially their other two daughters: Jenna who is 9 and Claire who is 3. May they find strength in one another, in their family and friends and the extended family and friends they met online who all supported and loved Layla. May they continue to find peace in their faith and know that Layla is with the Lord now.

We can also help to continue to raise awareness of Neuroblastoma. Click here to see how.
If you can, you can donate to Layla’s family by visiting their site and clicking on the Paypal “Donate” button. (All donations go towards Layla’s medical expenses).
Donations to Layla’s medical expenses can also be made at any Wells Fargo bank. Ask a manager to make a deposit to the Layla Grace Marsh donation account.

How to connect with the Marsh family:

- Follow Mom & Dad on Twitter
- Join their Facebook fan page
- Visit Layla’s website

In her short life, Layla was able to touch so many. It’s because of you that I am raising money to help fund pediatric cancer research. It is because of you that I fight for a cure. It is because of you that I now know what my purpose on this Earth is.

God Bless you Layla. Dance with the angels sweetie, dance…

2 Corninthians 4:7-12, 16-18

But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. For we who are alive are always being given over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that his life may be revealed in our mortal body. So then, death is at work in us, but life is at work in you.

Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

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A Love Letter

Dawana — Mon, 04 Jan 2010 23:26:13 +0000

Dear Cadence,

One year ago today, you completely changed my life. You came bursting into this world (literally, only 2 pushes) after almost 17 hours of very painful labor. I guess you wanted to be felt and heard because neither of the two epidurals that I received worked and I felt every bit of pain.

You were Daddy’s little princess right from the start.

You did not make the transition to parents for us very easy. From the day you were born you cried. And cried. And cried.

At one point in the hospital, the nurses came in to take you thinking they would give me a much needed break from all of your crying. Well, within five minutes they brought you right back because you would not stop crying and were just too loud to be in the nursery.

Your Dad and I could not understand why God had blessed us with a child who only wanted to fuss all of the time. But we pressed on as best as we could. And as you got older and began to come into your own, Mommy was able to stay home with you. It was so great to be there and watch as your little personality came out.

You were so curious and wanted to explore the world from very early on.

You wanted to know what everything was.

And you wanted to know WHO everyone was.

We figured out that you learned VERY quickly and that may or may not be a good thing… we weren’t quite sure.

You wanted to get moving right away, you had no time to waste!

And you wanted to do everything yourself- you didn’t need any help!

Oh and you were sure to let us know when things were not going your way…

Everything seemed to happen so fast after that. You learned to sit up on your own.

Then all of a sudden you were pulling up to stand.

And one day, you just took off…

Once you started walking, it was all downhill from there…

You needed to touch everything, see everything

and just get in. to. everything.

God help me the day you learn how to say ‘No.’ Your Dad and I can hardly keep up with you now. We have to use two baby gates to keep you confined to one area of the house.

But you have brought so. much. Joy to our lives. You light up every room that you are in and bring joy to everyone that you are around.

I love how silly you are. You think you are the funniest person on Earth… I guess that is a good thing because if you don’t think you’re funny, who else will- right? You love to dance and clap your hands and Oh Boy do you love Elmo!

Your smile is infectious!

You are our little helper. (Though most of the time you are not actually helping… that’s okay)

And even when you get into mischief…

We can’t stay mad at you for long.

You, my dear are going to grow up to do something great. You are so energetic, strong-willed, cautious when necessary, pensive, imaginative… A Momma could brag forever.

You are an absolute gift from God.

Daddy and I love you SO much and can’t even remember what our lives were like without you in it.

If I could give you one piece of advice baby girl, it would be: Go.

Go explore.

Go and do great things.

See the world.

Change the world.

Love others, even when you may not want to.

Help others, because kindness always comes back to you.

Love with all of your heart, though it may get broken.

Know that you are a Queen and should be treated as such by any man who has captured your heart.

Know when to walk away if he isn’t giving you all that you deserve and more.

And God help the man who thinks that he can mistreat you or try to put his hands on you. No woman deserves that and you have a Daddy, Uncles, Godfathers and people who will…. I won’t even go there. But pick up the phone and call.

Live each day. Don’t dwell on the past or worry about the future. Live. Your life. Now.

Daddy and I will always be here for you. And even if we are not, you have a huge family who loves you very much and will be there when you need them. Guaranteed.

Most importantly: Trust in the Lord, thy God, with all of your heart. (Do you hear me?) He will never steer you wrong. And even if the path gets rocky and you don’t quite understand how a God that loves you could make you walk down that road- keep walking. God is there. He has a plan for you, though it may not be very clear to you. Taking that beaten path will make you stronger and help you to grow into a dynamic woman. Without your faith, you have nothing.

You are our little princess. We love you today, tomorrow and forever.

With all of my heart,

Happy First Birthday

Your Proud Momma

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The One About The Day I Randomly Cut My Hair

Dawana — Fri, 11 Dec 2009 05:18:06 +0000

Who says that you have to wait until the New Year to start a-new?

Today was a normal day, besides the fact that I had to take my daughter down to the DMV and sit there in that germ infested hell hole and wait for over an hour to be called to the window and try to correct a mistake that they made when registering our car here in the great state of C-A. Our car is registered properly now- moving on.

Cadence was her normal mischievous, inquisitive, energetic self. Throwing herself on the floor at every turn and having tantrums because… well, because she feels like it. What? I can’t play in the toilet- I’ll throw myself on the floor. **rolling my eyes**

When Chris got home from work, I called him over to the bathroom mirror and asked him to help me cut. Now, he thought I was talking about cutting away the few knotty/nappy stray pieces of hair sticking out of my head. When I pointed to a specific location on my back he said “You want me to cut your hair?….. (pause) Oookay” Snip, snip, snip. “It’s just hair” I tell him, it will grow back.

Today, a mother lay her not even one month old daughter Cora to rest. Here I am bitching and moaning about how much California sucks, how much Cadence is running my life and how “bad” she is going to be when she’s older and how much she “doesn’t listen.” While a mother, my Twitter friend, is grieving the loss of her child….

Being home, alone, all day has really allowed me to take a look at myself- what I like, what I don’t like & want to change and what I would like to have. This is just a step in that process. Cutting my hair reminded me not to sweat the small stuff and to remember to thank God for everything. I got into the shower after I cut my hair and I was taken back to that place I was at in 2003 after I shaved it off. I let the water run through my short hair and I just said a not-so-silent prayer to God. Thanking Him, asking Him for continued guidance and to continue His work in me- because I know it’s not done.

It’s a new start. A New Year’s resolution in December. We’ll see where this takes me.

I’ll show you the finished product after I actually do my hair!

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The Post Which Cannot Be Named

Dawana — Sun, 29 Nov 2009 05:22:39 +0000

I don’t even know what to call this post. You can decide for yourself.

The other day when my family and I bowed our heads to give thanks to our good Lord for the awesome Thanksgiving meal that my mother prepared, my mom said: “We pray Lord for those who have nothing to eat today and no family to spend this holiday with.”

Now Chris and I pray together before we eat and we always pray for those who go without, but on Thanksgiving, more than ever when my mother said that, my heart really hurt for those who go without. It’s a mean world out there and it’s one thing to pray for those that go without and it’s another thing to do… to take action as we are called to do.

Why am I talking to you about this? Well, two things. Today is Tim Tebow’s last game at the swamp. He was being interviewed and was asked what he thought about the “nay sayers”- the people who want him to fail. Tim said what hurts the most is the people who says that he does what he does for TV (for example, when he went to prison to speak of God’s love to the inmates) And it is sad. He was raised in a family with a deep faith a family who serves as missionaries and he’s doing what comes natural to him.

The press calls them nay sayers and I call them haters. Really. Almost everyone has haters, right? People who hate on you for what you’re doing. You could be doing the most AWESOME thing in the world and they still find something bad to say about you- even if what they have to say is stupid (which it usually is). Look at Tim Tebow: he’s a winner. Because he’s a winner, he’s driven. He is a good student. He is a leader. He is passionate. Passionate about his faith, other people and the game. (The game, of course, being football) What more can you ask for?

I heard an ESPN sportscaster say that Tebow set the bar for where other players want to be. Not because of what kind of football player he is, but for what kind of person he is. Tim Tebow is “one of the great ones in college football.” They said that he is humble, kind and an all-around great person.You just feel good being in his presence.

The great Lou Holtz said today that Tim Tebow has such great character, integrity and a love of the game.

So go ahead haters, hate on Timmy T. You see in him the kind of person you WISH you could be. No, I’m not hanging on Timmy T’s jock, because next year, I’ll still be a Gator fan. This is, after all, Gator Nation. But that doesn’t mean that I can’t have a love for the guy who has a love for my team and a love for the game.

This brings me back to what I was originally saying… taking action. You guys remember Devri, my guest poster? She is doing. Spreading God’s love this holiday season through her Gifts of Hope program. What is Gifts of Hope?

” Blog readers will nominate a family in need in the first annual “Gifts of Hope”, where companies and individuals will donate goods to Santa’s bag to help bring one or more needy families a “Christmas of Hope and Joy” this coming Season. We would appreciate any products or donations that you have to offer a family in need this season.”

Then there’s Angela, owner of the Preppy Poppy, who spent the day before Thanksgiving making a dish for a Thanksgiving meal for families in need. Her OSC (Officer’s Spouses’ Club) delivered meals to five families in need for Thanksgiving. They found out that for some families, it will be their first Thanksgiving- can you imagine that? Never having a Thanksgiving? One family didn’t have a stove and used camping hot plates to cook. I have never not had a stove and I probably never will not have a stove. And even if there is a time in my life when I don’t have a stove- Chris and I are so blessed and fortunate to have so much family that loves us, that they wouldn’t rest until we had a stove.

On the news tonight I saw a story about a woman whose infant daughter died suddenly of a brain aneurysm. She was asked and agreed to donate her baby girl’s organs to other little children who needed them. Tonight she was meeting one of the children who received her daughter’s organs for the first time. The boy, who is now 8, received a liver from her daughter. She was able to save this young boy’s life. Her daughter was not able to live, but he was. How completely selfless of this family to be able to make a decision like that. Especially in a moment when they were suffering a loss and surely feeling so much pain.

Completely. Selfless.

I’m not trying to proselytize, not by any means. I know I have a whole bunch of shit wrong with me. I have to look at myself in the mirror everyday. There are so many days that I look at myself and ask how can I be a better person? Especially when I hear stories like the ones I’ve mentioned.

Chris and I often remind each other of how blessed we are. We have a home, food, clothes on our back, a beautiful daughter, family (who cares)…

The eye black on Timmy T’s face today had the following bible verse: Hebrews 12: 1-2, it reads:

¹Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. ²Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

How fitting for his final game in The Swamp?

or donations that you have to offer a family in need this season

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